Man, this was one crummy week. It was one of those weeks that is becoming all too familiar, one in which mistakes seem to attract other mistakes until there's a big fuzzy hairball of a mistake crowding me out of my cubicle. And I'm not the kind of person who takes these things in stride. No, I have to give myself a mental lashing several times a day and weep into my keyboard. I complained so much to my therapist that she asked if I could have ADD. How curious, I thought. So then I found myself at work and looking up ADD on the web when I should have been, well, working. More fuzz for the hairball.
Since I'm always ready to take on a new diagnosis--they're like virtual toys--I'm going to see the psychiatrist armed with a questionnaire that, if it doesn't indicate ADD, sure does indicate that I am a total flake.
Now, I always thought you had to be a hyperactive struggles-with-schoolwork kind of person to have ADD. Seems, though, you can just be a daydreamer who loses and forgets everything and is pathologically shy and gets bored all the time--they call it ADHD primarily inattentive, or something like that. If you're really smart and you like your classes you can keep looking good until the work gets too complex, which for me happened about the time I had to balance my own checkbook, which I did maybe three times before giving it up entirely. Over the years I've witnessed myself changing from pathologically shy to the kind of annoying person who interrupts you and can't stop talking. Meanwhile the academic prowess has unraveled itself into some fluffy yarn. I bet I would talk a lot in class now, if I could remember what time and place it meets. It's in my planner, but the planner has gone missing. I know it's here somewhere, if I could just get up the energy to look.