Saturday, March 31, 2007


DramaQueen has strep. I am lucky enough to have a doctor that sees patients on Saturday, so I was able to take her in just days after I visited for a sinus infection. If I get sick, the operation will have to be postponed, so I am willing myself to health so I can get this over with.

Someone in work commented, "You seem so calm; are you falling apart inside?" Dear Husband has made similar comments about my lack of grieving. Of course, right now I still have my right breast. It has not yet been replaced with an alien. For traumatic events (deaths are a different matter), I tend to grieve later--sometimes years later. Right now I have only one focus, which is to get to point A. How fitting that I should lose my breast on Good Friday. How could matters have been better arranged? I wonder if I will sleep through most of Easter, and will I be in the hospital for more than 3 days? I don't have the aversion to hospitals that some people experience (except for the knowledge that the longer you're there, the more likely you are to get an infection), but they are very dull.

Some other matters I've pondered: I'll be intubated for the surgery. That is a weird thought. I'll be catheterized as well--that's always jolly. I won't be able to eat or drink for I don't know how long after, in case they have to rush me back in. There will be some sort of inflatable things on my legs to keep me from getting blood clots. Of course, that brings to mind that I will be in danger of getting blood clots.

During the hospital assessment, the nurse asked me if how well I handle pain. Now, does anyone respond, "Oh, I can handle quite a bit, no problem"? And, if any of you do, are you crazy? Some people would rather be in pain that "out of it." Again, I ask, are you crazy? If I have to be stuck in a bed with a catheter, inflatable cuffs on my legs, and no food or water, I better get morphine out of the deal.


  1. My son had to get a blood test the other day and was incensed that what the nurse had promised would be feel like a "tiny pinch" had, in fact, hurt quite a bit. I explained that you always have to take whatever any medical professional tells you to anticipate pain-wise and triple it at least.

    You'll be in my prayers on Good Friday.

  2. I'll be remembering you in my prayers this Friday.

  3. happy easter. sorry, i haven't been around much. so many things happened and been through... still going through a lot now. praying for your fast recovery. (((HUGS)))

  4. ((((((((((BA))))))))))))))

    I came late to the conversation and am catching you on the other side of your surgery. I pray it went well and that you have a speedy recovery.


  5. I hope the surgery went well and that your recovery will be speedy. Best of wishes.